Walking With Lions

Waiting for Women to Wake Up

2010-04-22T22:33:00.002-05:00

77 cents to every dollar?
Lane Bryant ad more racy than Victoria's Secret?
Choice being craved away slowly and methodically?
Are any of you women paying attention?? Still we are under attack.
Just had to vent a little.

Of course it matters....

2010-02-15T21:08:00.002-06:00

I just read something that said 70% of the world's poor are female. That figure alone should make every woman realize that becoming powerful matters. Power is being able to do what you want to do, make things happen that need to happen, that YOU need to happen. It's not a dirty word. It's not something evil to be avoided. To be powerful means you can do what needs to be done. To be power hungry means to want to accomplish what you want to accomplish. Building power is something anyone can do: organize people and organize money, and the more people you gather together, the more money you can gather as well. Getting the right number of people and money together will guarantee you can make something great happen.
If more women were power hungry and gave time to building up relationships with other power hungry women and everyone gathered together the few dollars they had, maybe that 70% figure could be cut. Deeply.
Gamaliel Foundation leadership event: March 7-13 in St. Louis, MO
Come and make yourself over into someone who builds power and changes the world.

Ooops, I think we killed Britney......

2010-01-12T21:28:00.004-06:00

They say trouble comes in three's so here's three that have really bothered me lately: Britney Murphy's death, the Tiger Woods Harem and Rihanna mostly naked on the cover of GQ.
I'm convinced that Ms. Murphy's death was the result of extreme efforts to stay thin-thin-thin. We are all to blame for that especially we women. We are hardly raising a stink about the continuing preference for bone-thin frames. Oh, we fuss around when someone is photographed with her ribcage jutting out, but what about on a continuing basis? There may be something going on...I admit I haven't really researched it but where is the steady rumble of women's voices say "No, we won't torture ourselves." Image, appearance is the one place where we seem to say no and always mean yes, the thinner the better.
The Tiger Woods Harem, if that's what we're dealing with, at first made me laugh. All these women coming out and claiming to have had an affair with golf's Superman. I was ready to admit to a tryst myself if there was a buck or two in it; for the cause of course. Then I thought how sad it was that these women wanted to be publicly acknowledged as The Other Woman. Were they in love with him or the idea of being on the arm of a rich and powerful man? Were they so satisfied to be in the shadow of this man that they couldn't create a life in which they were the primary player? In 2010 women seem to prefer to be known as the woman behind...or under...the man.
I was shocked that after all Rihanna went through, suddenly she showed up mostly naked on the cover of GQ. Victimized again, absolutely and probably by her own "people". I'm sure they fed her some line about how being naked is a great way for a formerly victimized woman to show the world how brave and liberated she is, how she is completely over her ordeal and moving on with her life. No it's not! It's cheap and easy publicity; and a solid percentage for your "people."
It's 2010 and this year needs to be different. Women need to realize that as the majority population, as the majority in the workforce, as the leaders in small businesses creating new jobs, they have a tremendous amount of power. Too much power to torture themselves into a size 0; too much power to be identified only as the companion of a man; too much power to get naked for somebody else's bank account.

Sign Up Now!

2009-12-04T09:15:00.003-06:00

Now is the time to get signed up for Ntosake 2010. The information you need is on the Gamaliel website. Please pay attention to who should and should not be there. Yes, we have criteria!
This is a companion training to the Weeklong Leadership Event. It is NOT a stand alone training. Some women think they're doing just fine without furthering their public life education by avoiding Weeklong. We should never assume that we are fully equiped to do God's work. There is always something new to learn, someone new to meet. You go to Weeklong before Ntosake or within the 12 months after; please do not neglect your education.
This is not a touchy feely girls weekend/pajama party. We are working and working hard to be the best we can be as agents of change in our communities and congregations. You do not serve God well or at all if you just sit in the pew and glow. God's love won't get out into the world where it needs to be if you hold it hostage in your sanctuary!
This is not an event for every woman. Some women don't need it at all but we find most women benefit from coming to at least one session. Women who just want time away....stay away. We are not your vacation weekend. We can recharge those batteries for the work at hand, but not just to give you a break from your day to day "stuff".
Be prepared. Go to the web site and down load the packet. It should be available, if not it will be very soon. Keep checking back. And stay on your organizer. Let him/her help you decide if and why you should come and how to pay for the cost.
I am looking forward to seeing you in Hampton Roads!!

Let's Ask Roman...

2009-09-30T21:32:00.003-05:00

On the news tonight they reported that an adult woman had sex with a 13 year old boy. I asked myself, well, if she's a genius that's o.k. Right? Roman Polanski is a genius; everyone says so. Because he is a genius we are supposed to excuse his little mistake 30 years ago. You remember: 13 year old girl, doped, drunk....raped. Or not. Whoopie Goldberg claims it wasn't a RAPE rape. What???? Roman's friends seem to think that it is a right and good thing to sacrifice one little 13 year old girl on the altar of his genius. Look at all the great movies he's produced. A little 13 year old ass seems to go a long way. Besides, here's a guy who escaped the Nazis as a child and lost his movie starlet wife to a brutal murder. He's entitled to a little mistake.
Excusing Roman Polanski makes it open season on our girls. Oh, wait. It doesn't really change anything does it?
Carry on.

For Cryin' Out Loud...Drive!

2009-09-02T21:41:00.003-05:00

Power is a gift from God; given for the purpose of getting done what needs to be done to transform our world. It's like a car, maybe a Mustang, given to us, no taxes. It has a never empty tank. What do we do with this wicked car?? We park it in the drive-way and grin. "Look what God gave me. Isn't it nice? I can do so much with it but of course I never drive it."
What an insult to God! Who do we think we are wasting what God gives us?
It's time to get in the car and DRIVE IT LIKE IT'S STOLEN!!!

Go Jimmy!

2009-07-22T13:26:00.001-05:00

Follow the link to a great article about women and religion. Mr. Carter writes powerfully about women being equal with men in the eyes of God. Amen. Most actions against women are more culturally based than Scripture based. Sometimes I wonder if some men are just plain afraid.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/jul/12/jimmy-carter-womens-rights-equality

Public meetings are happening all over the country. Are you attending the ones in your area.

Getting ready for the roar..

2009-07-13T21:53:00.002-05:00

I've been keeping the planning for the next Ntosake all in my head. Now I'm beginning to put things on paper, to commit time to changing what didn't work and strengthening what did. I'm looking forward to another event with new women and returning women, all hungry to be stronger. All of them with one goal in mind: to be the complete person God intended me to be, to be the change that is needed. And to stop all that whining! I'll start a new routine of prayer and reading of journaling, and yes, exercise. Movement of body will stimulate movement of mind. Get ready to roar, Ntosake.

A State of Blah

2009-06-18T21:08:00.004-05:00

Where have I been?? Living in a State of Blah. I don't know how I got here and it's tough getting out. I have learned in the last few weeks that if I'm not doing something hands on, I tend to drift, to doze and just not be interested. (I have also discovered Facebook and Twitter. Fast fun and feedback.)
We cycle. Our days, our weeks, our months, even our hours. Our bodies shift over time and new normals occur. What I did at 30, I'm not doing at 50. And that's o.k. I do other things now. I move at a different pace now but still trying to settle on a pace that actually works. That's how you end up in the State of Blah, slogging through shifts, cycles and paces. My grandmother used to say: this too shall pass. I believe she was right.

The Great Debate, part 1...

2009-05-05T10:27:00.001-05:00

Charity vs. social justice. There seems to be some idea that only one or the other is necessary. Actually we need both and we should be challenged to be engaged in both. Charity puts us front and center in 'need'. We are face to face with the least, the lost and the left behind; the widow, the orphan and the alien. That's a Biblical way of discribing "the fringe of the fringe", the people who are without about anything and everything most of us take for granted: regular meals, continous housing, on-demand medical care, means of earning money to get lots of stuff. (We do loves our stuff!) We must be aware of the need that charity responds to...and that's all it does. Responds; react. A sack of food will only stave off hunger, not solve the problem of not being able to get food for ones self. A nightly shelter will only keep a person off the street a night at a time, not address the reason they're on the street in the first place and get them permanently off the streets. We will always need charity. There will always be a place for the immediate response to pain and suffering.
BUT...
Social justice is about addressing the reason for the charity's creation.

How's Your Health???

2009-04-27T20:51:00.002-05:00

Just back from the clergy meeting in Chi-town. Wow! The stories were heartbreaking and painful. No insurance and chronic health problems; sharing drugs with other people or just skipping meds altogether. Foregoing doctor visits, tests, self-medicating and on and on and on. I got angry listening. Angry that hard working people are going without basic care. Angry that some people see quality health care as a privilege for a few and not a basic for all. Even worse is the reaction of the community of faith. Where are the People of God?? Most of them seem to be organizing trivia nights and spaghetti suppers to help for some poor child's chemo treatments. What would happen if we all went to Wahington D.C. on June 24th?? Put it on your calendars....more to follow!

Go Team Go...

2009-04-19T19:54:00.004-05:00

In the church we usually think about committees. Dozens of committees and countless hours of meetings. Committees are teams if they're effective. The reason they're not always effective is because of the people on the committee in the first place. Just ask yourself about some of the committees you've served. Why? To help a friend on the nominating committee get all the slots filled? Guilt? Maybe a martyr's sense of obligation? Of course we sometimes become parts of committees because we are excited about what is happening, we want to further the cause...or whatever. We might even have some fun along the way. That's when committee's become teams and things get done; powerful things.
The most effective way to reach any goal is to build a team around it. It must be people who can help you acheive that goal but can also acheive something for themselves in the process. People should see their own goals in the goals of others. We serve each other best when we serve each other's self-interest. Or we all do better when we all do better.
Start with a few one on ones to see who shares the passion and goal you have and what do they bring to the table: information, relationships, experience....money? How can you help each other? Do your goals intersect? Who else can you add? Build your team, plan your actions, and go team go!

Blog love???

2009-04-08T14:27:00.004-05:00

I am learning so much. Like in the "link" space, you do not put the words intended for the "tags" space. If you do that, Blogger won't let you post and people following your blog think you have already become bored and moved on to a new activity. Still here; still posting; still learning.

The Intentional Conversation

2009-04-05T21:55:00.004-05:00

One on one. One to one. Interchangeable terms for the same thing, an intentional conversation meant to accomplish very specific goals. First and foremost, a one on one is meant to build a relationship. It might serve to create a new relationship or to deepen an existing relationship. Relationships are the foundation of community, any community. In our faith communities it is the relationships that keep people coming.
Second, a one on one is meant to undercover those things that a person is most passionate about. Passionate as in what they love most, fear most, are angry about most. It's the first step in identifying a person's self-interest. Self-interest is what really motivates people to act, and act with conviction, commitment and in strength.
Third, a one on one is meant to bring clarity to a person. People don't often get to talk about themselves, not in a meaningful way at least. When a person is being asked about those significant events that have shaped them, it's at that point a person can actually recognize that....those events made them the person they are and motivate them to act on certain issues! It also helps the person asking the questions to become more clear on why a person behaves they way they do.
Last, but certainly not least, a one on one is a way to simply gather information about a person: where were they born? Siblings? Edcation? Hobbies? Faith journey? The basics we all want to know about each other and share all the time.
Taking the time to learn about another person is one way to build our community. It's how we break the cycle of isolationism caused by our modern life and it's lack of interpersonal connections.

Agitation is not a dirty word....

2009-03-10T19:30:00.000-05:00

Agitation is a feared word to those who don't engage in it on a regular and intentional basis. The 2 main complaints are 1. I hate being yelled at, and 2. He/She was so mean to that other person.
Agitation is not about yelling; but it happens when the agitator gets all worked up.
Agitation is not about being mean; but it sounds like it when the truth is found out.
Agitation is about pushing and pulling a person to the excellence you know they are capable of. It's usually a firm conversation and can be hard. Part of the exercise involves challenging a person to reach deep inside and discover why that excellence has not already been reached: what is holding you back and then: when are you going to do about it.
Agitation requires judgement; exposing what most people don't want to acknowledge but already know. It's hard to make a judgement about a stranger so that means there needs to be a relationship between agitator and agitatee.
At the Ntosake table we'll practice agitation. It's an art. It's an act of love and respect. Really.

In the Beginning...

2009-02-13T19:58:00.000-06:00

I've been involved with Ntosake since 1993....16 years! It doesn't seem like that long at all. It was supposed to be a way to be a better way to teach the organizing concepts presented during the weeklong leadership event at Gamaliel and in a way that related to women. It did that and then some. It started as the Women's Weekend and the next thing we knew we were the "it" leadership event at Gamaliel. There's been an event every year since with 50 to 100 women at a time...except for '95 through '97. Some years were tougher than others to get volunteers together and make it happen. Even during those "fallow" years, there were constant inquiries: when is the next Ntosake?? Where is it?? When can I register??
I can't imagine a year without Ntosake and now I'm looking forward to all of the Gamaliel affiliates creating local Ntosake groups. The purpose is to keep the fire burning, the fire that started at the weekend event. Too often after a great experience, the positive effects wear off, the possibilities dim and the doubts grow. We lose heart, we get mushy and go back to our old behaviors.
A group of St. Louis women met tonight. We are going to continue to meet once a month. We'll use a written work report to record the plans for one on ones, goals, results from agitations and propositions and we'll reflect with one another the progress and pitfalls of our Path to Power.
How's it going in your city??

Well, here we go....

2009-02-12T15:05:00.000-06:00

I said for weeks I was going to start a blog and here it is. I hope this proves to be an active site for sharing information and experiences with the Gamaliel Ntosake Women. I'm looking forward to all of you reading it and giving me some feedback. Right now, I'm just glad I figured this blog thing out; got it up anyway. AND while I have you, make sure you paid for your January weekend in St. Louis!!